Charter member
posts
#125441, "My apologies"
Thu Aug-04-05 01:36 PM by buzybeezmom
Just wanted to say I am sorry for invading your space. I was apparently under the impression that it was ok for me to stay, considering I had out right asked that if I for some reason didnt get the boys if I could stay, several invited me to stay, while NO ONE objected. I have made several friends here on the boards since going through the whole mess with the and not getting the boys, I am sorry if I have caused any of you any embarrassment or inconvience...thank you for all advice, laughs and encouragement, again my apologies for invading your space.
Sonya..wife to Todd
Mother of 3 Very Busy B's!!!!
Foster Parents awaiting our first call.
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Replies to this topic
RE: My apologies, TiffaniRay, Aug 04th 2005, #1
RE: My apologies, jenanddarol, Aug 04th 2005, #2
RE: My apologies, buzybeezmom, Aug 04th 2005, #3
RE: My apologies, TiffaniRay, Aug 04th 2005, #4
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #5
RE: My apologies, jenanddarol, Aug 04th 2005, #6
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #7
RE: My apologies, BYU49er, Aug 04th 2005, #8
RE: My apologies, LRB, Aug 04th 2005, #9
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #10
RE: My apologies, VballPlayer, Aug 04th 2005, #11
RE: My apologies, jenanddarol, Aug 04th 2005, #12
RE: My apologies, karenms50, Aug 04th 2005, #13
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #14
RE: My apologies, jenanddarol, Aug 04th 2005, #23
RE: My apologies, ash, Aug 04th 2005, #15
RE: My apologies, jenanddarol, Aug 04th 2005, #16
RE: My apologies, TiffaniRay, Aug 04th 2005, #18
RE: My apologies, TiffaniRay, Aug 04th 2005, #17
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #19
RE: My apologies, cath, Aug 04th 2005, #20
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #24
RE: My apologies, funx3, Aug 04th 2005, #21
RE: My apologies, nytripletmommy, Aug 04th 2005, #22
RE: My apologies, jenlaw, Aug 04th 2005, #25
RE: My apologies, tracypt, Aug 04th 2005, #26
ENOUGH ALREADY!!!, Dachshund Mom, Aug 04th 2005, #27
TiffaniRay
Thu Aug-04-05 01:59 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
2413 posts
#125444, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 0
Ok, I am going to reply to this cause it is eating at me. I think one of the problems was that your first initial post on Jun 14th you stated... "By the way, please know that if something happens and we do not get the triplets, I will post and let you know, but as of right now they are a week away from being here. When they get here, you can be sure I will post and let you know!!!"
Can you see where some of us are under the impression that you set it up so you could stay? The other problem is your other posts are not HOM related and were pushing important topics to the 2nd & 3rd pages where members had to *bump* them back up. Then you would get upset when you got little or no replies. There are just some things we can't help you with.
And while no one objected, they did give you subtle hints that you would feel more comfortable on a more appropriate board. You seem not to have a problem with that as you post on the Texas Foster parents board too with a completely different story I might add.
Obviously, a bunch of us have been discussing this off-board and we feel you would do better not being a member here on TC. You don't fit the profile and some of your posts just don't jive and/or make sense. Sorry to be so blunt but we were been trying to hint to you for awhile now.
Tiffani & Ray(NJ)
Aidan, Nolan & Gabrielle
http://rayandtiffani.homestead.com/homepage.html
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jenanddarol
Thu Aug-04-05 02:18 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
512 posts
#125456, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 0
You seem like a very sweet person and you certainly shouldn't take it personally. But to get right to the point...why are you here? We don't get it. We GOT that you might be getting triplets, but then you weren't. Yet your posting frequency only increased. It all seems so odd. I don't know who invited you to stay, but did you ever consider that perhaps they were only being polite or felt sorry for you? Did you ever consider that perhaps all the rest of us that knew this wasn't the appropriate place for you felt that it was indeed, time for you to go but just didn't want to be rude and come out and say so. We assumed that perhaps people have enough common sense to realize that for themselves without being told.
I re-read though you post when you announced that you were indeed not getting the triplets.... from what I can tell not a single person encouraged you to say. They were entirely sympathetic to your heartbreaking situation as TCers always are, but if you look at what's NOT being said....the message is profound. No one is begging you to stay since they know its not appropriate.
Again, you are very sweet and would be a great addition to any singleton forum you join. Good luck to you.
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buzybeezmom Thu Aug-04-05 02:29 PM
Charter member
posts
#125462, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 2
Again, my apologies...I have requested I be removed from the forum as well as all of my posts. This way they will be out of the way and not keeping anyones post from being at the top of the list.
Thanks again to you all for the kindess, advice and help.
Sonya..wife to Todd
Mother of 3 Very Busy B's!!!!
Foster Parents awaiting our first call.
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TiffaniRay
Thu Aug-04-05 02:34 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
2413 posts
#125464, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 3
Thank you. I have already made Jeff aware of this.
Tiffani & Ray(NJ)
Aidan, Nolan & Gabrielle
http://rayandtiffani.homestead.com/homepage.html
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 03:05 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125474, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 4
I didn't realize that Tiffani was in charge of who could and couldn't post here. This is the kind of crap that pisses me off about this board.
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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jenanddarol
Thu Aug-04-05 03:12 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
512 posts
#125477, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 5
For every one person that has the courage to post, there are DOZENS that don't even though they feel the same way. Tiffany's voice is really the collective voice of what is probably the majority of us on TC. Bravo to those willing to take the heat to say what needs to be said. Of all the things that should piss you off about what is happening on this board, this is not it.
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 03:16 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125479, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 6
You guys get way too caught up in stuff here! If you don't want to read a post from someone, don't...simple as that. Yes, it may be odd that some people want to hang around, but I don't think anyone's being hurt by it.
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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BYU49er
Thu Aug-04-05 03:18 PM
Member since Jul 20th 2005
106 posts
#125481, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 5
Tiffani is not in charge here any more than anyone else is. She does alert me frequently to messages that are suspect and outside the guidelines of the forum. Some are removed, some are not. Each of you have the opportunity of doing so. The Triplet Connection has been burned in the past with "fakers" who pose as legitimate users that eventually become very confrontational with there posts to coverup the ongoing lies they have created for themselves. This becomes a waste of everyone's time and detracts from the overall quality of the board. We try at all times to maintain a reputable database of users that form the basis for the highest quality forum possible. Instead of being down on her for her alerts, you should be thankful that she takes the time to question some who lurk and peruse the board to get kicks out of having their posts taken as legitimate.
Jeff
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LRB
Thu Aug-04-05 03:28 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
474 posts
#125487, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 8
Jeff, thank you so much for all that you do.
I remember Triplet Connection when there was a forum. I'm sure there are others besides me that remembers the old "Q&A" section that was updated every few days (weeks, sometimes months).
I also remember several very ligitimate triplet families that have left triplet connection because of fakers, confrontational posts that became personal, cliques, etc.
It is up to all of us to work through Jeff to make sure that this site lives up to the mission of Triplet Connection. If nothing else, out of respect for Jeff and Janet and the Triplet Connection's budget.
Yes, we can choose whether or not to read a post; however, if NTR posts or posts from people who really should be on a general .msn.com parenting board are cluttering up the posts that meet the guidelines, then yes, it does affect us all.
OK, I'm off my soapbox now...
Robin
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 03:48 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125493, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 9
Fakers are one thing. Of course they should be gone immediately and thank you to everyone, including Tiffani, who call them out. I guess I don't see the difference between a NTR post started by a non-triplet person vs. a NTR post started by a HOM person. IMO a Harry Potter thread is a "clutter" and certainly NOT triplet related, but you didn't see me complaining about that. What's the difference? Should we eliminate ALL NTR threads and keep this board strictly about triplets or more? If someone wants to give me suggestions for my kid's birthday party, at least they are helping me with an issue dealing with my triplets and not discussing a book that has nothing to do with triplets...clarify this for me because I see it as being very "elitist" as someone else called it.
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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VballPlayer
Thu Aug-04-05 04:02 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
163 posts
#125500, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 10
For every one person that has the courage to post, there are DOZENS that don't even though they feel the same way.
That goes both ways...people who don't care about the NTR topics aren't going to jump out and say so when someone attacks another member either. There are better ways of handling situations like that without making public attacks.
In some ways, I understand what you are saying, but in other ways, it seems very "elitist" as the poster above me wrote. If I lose one of my babies during pregnancy, does that mean I can't post here anymore because technically, I only have two babies instead of 3?
And what about the twin sites that triplet moms post to? Or the women with quads (or more, like the Gosselins?) that post here? Are they/we/you not allowed to post anywhere else because you have triplets and not twins? If someone loses their pregnancy all together, but still has other children, are they not allowed to post anywhere on this forum except in the bereaved parents column?
There are many people here (me included) that have discussed other children who are not triplets and have asked NTR questions. Sometimes my posts about my triplet pregnancy get pushed aside - not necissarily by triplet related questions either - and many times from other triplet parents. I'm not complaining. That's what happens on a message board.
But, I guess I don't see the harm in someone that came here for support, looking for answers, lost the adoption petition, and stayed here because they found comfort among us. I hate fakers and troublemakers as much as the rest of you (and have seen many in my day on many other boards).
I know I won't change any minds, and I"m not even going to try and debate the topic, because it is a no win situation. I just wanted to point out there are two sides to everyting and while many may wish for those non HOM's to go away, there are people who really don't care either way.
Carrie
married to Dan
mom to Tyler and
mom to Noah
triplets due 12/17/05
http://talk.sheknows.com/tickers/pregnancy/pregtickers1
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jenanddarol
Thu Aug-04-05 04:12 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
512 posts
#125502, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 11
Thu Aug-04-05 04:12 PM by jenanddarol
As I said before I support a very BROAD definition (broader than most) of who belongs on an HOM forum. My best friend Psalm, for instance, has surviving twins that were originally a part of a set of quads. Also say for instance a mom who adopts twins and ends up giving birth herself shortly after. Or anyone caring for multiple same age children... Aunts, nannies, whatever... I stood up for a mom of two sets of twins when she got majorly flamed on this board. I stood up for another mom of two sets of twins in one of my email groups. Having said all that the line MUST be drawn somewhere or we aren't an HOM forum after all, just a parenting forum, heck not even that!
As for the OT threads I feel for those who get annoyed by it. I honestly do. I wish I could post something in the Non-Multiples related forum and get a response, but as well all know, nobody goes there. Maybe we could try to revive it somehow? Like MTM stated in the other thread, its nice to have that kind of commradarie. Commradarie that cannot exist if topics are strictly limited to feeding schedule and strollers.
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karenms50
Thu Aug-04-05 04:49 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
731 posts
#125523, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 12
Just wanted to say thank to Tiffani for being the voice of many others thoughts...including mine...I too was wondering why she kept posting.
Karen - lucky wife to Paul,
Proud mom to spontaneous boys
"It wasn't until God blessed us with triplets, that I knew it was His calling for me to be a mother!"
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 04:50 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125525, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 12
I don't have a problem with OT threads becuase if I don't want to read it, I don't. I'm sure I've posted one or two myself and I'm sure someone here will do a search and read every last thing I have written here to pull a quote out and try prove a point about something because that's the kind of catiness (sp?) that I see here from certain people.
What irritates me is that I haven't see anyone being attacked and I haven't seen any flat out lies that someone has triplets and they don't (in this situation, anyway). Of course, I don't have time to read every post, as I have triplets...So that leaves the issue to be that triplet related posts are being pushed down so that NTR posts can be answered. I'm being told that that's what should piss me off...well buzybee's not the only one posting NTR posts. Again, explain why it's OK for some and not for others. I have no idea why someone without triplets would want to hang around and I find it odd too, but give me a break.
If I wanted to be catty, I could raise the issue of some people (several, actually) possibly being fakers because I don't see how on earth some of the women here have time to read and respond to almost every post, research people's pasts and do all the other things they do, all while parenting triplets or more! But, I'm not like that
Enough from me, I'm sure I'll get lots of negative posts, but THIS has waisted enough of my time today. I have more important things to do.
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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jenanddarol
Thu Aug-04-05 07:04 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
512 posts
#125589, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 14
For someone who claims not to be catty, you sure are really good at it.
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ash
Thu Aug-04-05 04:55 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
342 posts
#125532, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 8
Would it not have been better to have contacted this individual privately and asked her why she was posting if it was felt that she no longer fit the criteria for being a member of TC? I have to admit I cringed this morning when I read the comments made to her last post, I was not surprised when she immediately decided not to remain on the board. In my opinion I think the whole thing was not handled very well. She could have been removed without the need for this public finger pointing - was it really necessary to do it in such a public fashion?
Ash
http://www.baby-gaga.com/>
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jenanddarol
Thu Aug-04-05 05:56 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
512 posts
#125556, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 15
From what I understand, back channels were tried and failed. Then a very diplomatic post was made that didn't point the finger at anyone specific. Hints were made and ignored. Other things were tried, unfortunately they did not work. Its hard to be so blunt, but better to get it over with than let it go on and on... I mean this individual has had nearly 500 posts in six weeks, more than ANY other person on TC and she doesn't even have/know HOMs. This wasn't just some once-in-a-while poster that's easy to ignore. With that much posting, she really brought the attention upon herself.
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TiffaniRay
Thu Aug-04-05 06:00 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
2413 posts
#125559, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 16
Thank you Jen. Like I said before. There is A LOT more to the story. Jeff knows and a few select others know and helped with info, etc... Really, we don't need to get into it. A very polite backdoor approach was used and turned down. This was the only option and it worked.
Tiffani & Ray(NJ)
Aidan, Nolan & Gabrielle
http://rayandtiffani.homestead.com/homepage.html
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TiffaniRay
Thu Aug-04-05 05:57 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
2413 posts
#125557, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 5
If I pissed you off then I did my job. That said, there is more to the story with Buzybeezmom. It's a need to know basis. Jeff needs/needed to know, you don't.
Tiffani & Ray(NJ)
Aidan, Nolan & Gabrielle
http://rayandtiffani.homestead.com/homepage.html
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 06:15 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125568, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 17
OK, I wanted to be done with this, but obviously I can't. Your "job" is to piss me off???? What the h#*l does that mean?????
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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cath
Thu Aug-04-05 06:47 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
16 posts
#125581, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 19
Tracy,
Don't get too worked over this. I know its annoying.MOst days I don't even read these boards! You are argueing with someone that has so much time they can research other people to butt into their business and needs so much attention that they clutter the board with posts about shows about themselves for three years!!
cath
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 07:08 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125590, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 20
Thank God someone sees it as I do....I agree with your ENTIRE post and would have said it myself pretty soon!
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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funx3
Thu Aug-04-05 06:48 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
139 posts
#125582, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 19
Hey Tracey!
Don't worry......she used a similar line like that on me before too (back when all the Oprah show stuff was happening). I have learned to try and steer clear of reading or posting anything that has her name attached after she responded that way to me. I also love the "few select others" thing too.
I also wanted to say that I completely agree with you and your approach on this. I think that for those of us who have other lives besides the Triplet Connection probably lean towards the way that you are thinking. There are those of us who find this site extremely helpful when we need advice on things. Then there are those that feel it is their business to "research" and "look up" everything on everyone else. I love this site and will continue to use it and read the posts that I want to read and not read the ones I don't.
For example, when there was a post about someone's TLC makeover reminding us all exactly when it was on....AGAIN and AGAIN, I chose not to click on that and read it. That is just one example of a "NTR" post that I chose not to read. There are some other "NTR" post that are actually quite interesting.
Take care,
Renee
(mom to Dalton, Griffin, and Zach 6-1-00)
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nytripletmommy
Thu Aug-04-05 07:03 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
77 posts
#125588, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 21
AMEN Tracy, Renee and Cath!!! Couldn't have said it better myself!
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jenlaw
Thu Aug-04-05 07:12 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
241 posts
#125591, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 22
TRIPLE ditto cath, tracy, renee and nytripletmommy!!!
jen
http://lilypie.com>
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tracypt
Thu Aug-04-05 07:13 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
214 posts
#125592, "RE: My apologies"
In response to Reply # 21
I was starting to feel like I was only one who was not part of the "select few" and felt that sometimes people get a little overbearing and feel like they rule the roost. You guys have made my day better. Why I let someone I don't even know get my panties in a wad, I'll never know...
Tracy
Mommy to Lindsey, Patrick and Brooke
Born 1-14-03 at 32weeks, 3 days and ^i^ twins Dylan 1-12-02 and Cole 1-21-02
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Dachshund Mom
Thu Aug-04-05 07:27 PM
Member since Jul 19th 2005
102 posts
#125598, "ENOUGH ALREADY!!!"
In response to Reply # 0
LETS ALL MOVE ON.
Sam
Mom to Brett, Zachary & Shaylee-31wks 6dys. 2/02/05
The loves of my life
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