Triplethefun04
Tue Mar-27-07 01:55 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
63 posts
#268512, "An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
I just want to apologize for my part in all the drama these past few weeks. It stems from a combination of frustration and cabin fever, I'm sure.
Frustrated for all the new moms that come on here looking for advice on certain subjects and only getting answers from some moms that can only give advice on how to be perfect and making the new moms and moms that have been around awhile, feel like they are not living up to the standards that they think a triplet mom should be. Which is what, really?
Frustrated for not being able to answer a question in a real manner because then I would be jumped all over, because I haven't done something like others think I should.
Frustrated because we can't discuss, disagree and then move on without our threads getting pulled, because it's not along the lines of giving hugs and support when really what the original poster wants is a real answer. We're adults, we can disagree, work it out and move on. We don't need to be censored so much that saying anything out of line just creates "drama" and then we're shut down.
Frustrated because we have some on here that seem to like to get the attention they think they need and then it takes away from the ones that really need some attention or advice. They then become afraid to post for fear of being thought of as drama-seekers. We all have stuff happening. Life isn't perfect. Everyone should feel welcome to come here and either ask for support, advice or just to vent without be thought of negatively. Some just take it way too far and it has to stop!
Frustrated because this board has so much potential and could help so much more if some things were implemented better. For instance a FAQ area where all the same questions that need answers can be answered instead of getting asked every couple of days. Search engines could be more user friendly. Like age ranges could be put in place so we can discuss amongst ourselves. I personally think that most of the sections are not used and wasted space, so why not fill them up with stuff most of us could really use?
Frustrated that there is an exclusive group on here that think because their triplets are older, they're better than the rest of us! Heaven forbid we go and ask them a question that they've dealt with before. Let's help each other out and not cut each other down every chance we get.
As you all are aware by now, there was a separate place created to spoof and to vent these frustrations and for those that don't like to sugar coat answers can go for support. We can't get it here and we can't give it here, unless it's only positive and supportive. So many thought it was funny in the beginning, but then it turned ugly. First to admit that, so the rest involved should also, it came from both sides, not just us! Many here decided to take it further than it was ever meant to be taken. Some on here crossed the line further than any of us would ever take it, but yet feel the need to hide. Some of you were even contributing members to our site.
I'm not looking to stir up any more "drama." We like where we are, but we also like to post over here to give some advice or ask questions when we feel the need. We aren't monsters like some of you think we are. Really, if we were, do you think we'd still have our children or that we would even post here?? Let's let things go, move on and get past all this woman-hating that's been going on. We are all adults and we can conduct ourselves accordingly. You leave us alone and we'll leave you alone, which we have, but ah well, some can't let it go.
So that's my apology, like it or not, take it or leave it. I'm not worried about whether you like me or not. I've been around here long enough to see the drama come and go. I've been around long enough to glean good advice and I think give some, no matter what some think of me. I'm not the type to really worry about what others think. I've got an opinion and I'll share it!
Michelle
(formerly known as bsebllmom9 )
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Replies to this topic
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, meagranny, Mar 27th 2007, #1
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, Ma Kettle, Mar 27th 2007, #2
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #3
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, foreveramom, Mar 27th 2007, #6
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, angeliagg, Mar 27th 2007, #4
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, 3D Montana Mama, Mar 27th 2007, #5
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #7
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, TiffaniRay, Mar 27th 2007, #8
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tulip, Mar 27th 2007, #17
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, madmolly, Mar 27th 2007, #18
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tulip, Mar 27th 2007, #28
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, boomom, Mar 27th 2007, #30
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #33
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, cdemp, Mar 27th 2007, #35
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, ZwickJB, Mar 27th 2007, #42
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, cdemp, Mar 27th 2007, #46
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, ZwickJB, Mar 27th 2007, #48
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, cdemp, Mar 27th 2007, #49
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, boomom, Mar 27th 2007, #53
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #54
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, boomom, Mar 27th 2007, #57
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #44
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, cdemp, Mar 27th 2007, #47
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, 3D Montana Mama, Mar 27th 2007, #12
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, CrunchyMomto3, Mar 27th 2007, #9
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, foreveramom, Mar 27th 2007, #11
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, CrunchyMomto3, Mar 27th 2007, #14
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, Lynnieg123, Mar 27th 2007, #16
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tulip, Mar 27th 2007, #
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, HOWMANY, Mar 27th 2007, #10
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tripletots98, Mar 27th 2007, #13
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, DebM, Mar 27th 2007, #15
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, Mamakitten3, Mar 27th 2007, #19
Why?!?!?!?!, tripletots98, Mar 27th 2007, #21
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, madmolly, Mar 27th 2007, #23
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, julytrips, Mar 27th 2007, #36
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tripletots98, Mar 27th 2007, #38
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, julytrips, Mar 27th 2007, #39
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tulip, Mar 27th 2007, #40
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, madmolly, Mar 27th 2007, #41
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #24
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, kmoore, Mar 27th 2007, #20
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, DebM, Mar 27th 2007, #25
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, boomom, Mar 27th 2007, #22
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tulip, Mar 27th 2007, #31
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, julytrips, Mar 27th 2007, #37
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, CrunchyMomto3, Mar 27th 2007, #26
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, TripletDad2005, Mar 27th 2007, #27
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, kylamel, Mar 27th 2007, #29
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, ShanAZ, Mar 27th 2007, #32
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, Annie3, Mar 27th 2007, #34
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, ZwickJB, Mar 27th 2007, #43
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tripplefun, Mar 27th 2007, #45
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, foreveramom, Mar 27th 2007, #51
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, tripplefun, Mar 27th 2007, #50
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #52
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, 6BlueEyes, Mar 27th 2007, #55
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, jonib, Mar 27th 2007, #56
RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9, Triplethefun04, Mar 27th 2007, #58
meagranny
Tue Mar-27-07 02:06 PM
Member since Nov 22nd 2005
276 posts
#268514, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Makes me wonder if I ask too many guestions on here. If I have oh well thats what the board is for, or so I thought. I ask alot of things on here because many of you here have alot of good info. I will keep posting and hope I still get good advice. Thanks Michelle and all of the other ladys who have been helpfull to me over the last year and a half or so.
Most of you have been great support through Jackie's preterm babies and the issues we have had to deal with.
Wanda, grandma to triplets
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Ma Kettle
Tue Mar-27-07 02:07 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
445 posts
#268515, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
I'm sorry if I can't accept your apology. I came back here to get and give advice and on the first day back was misquoted from another board and basically snapped at by sharks intended to deny me admittance to some sort of elite group. I've done nothing to anyone here and the rude snipes hurt. Hearing how frustrated YOU are doesn't make the hurt any less and it's not an apology. It's an excuse that I don't accept.
Mom of 11 and 1/2! Next one is due 9/2007
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 02:14 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268518, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 2
Kettle,
if you can't accept the non-necessary apology, please just don't respond. Why oh why would you respond that way??? Michelle is a wonderful contributor to this board with excellent advice and some GREAT suggestions. I hope some of them are implemented here. There was zero sarcasm in her post and she truly didn't have to say a thing.
Please just don't read a post from those that you feel have offended you and as Jeff says..."keep it off the board".
Geesh....as they say...no good deed goes unpunished...
Michelle, I appreciate all of those suggestions and hopefully we can make some progress here! THANK YOU!
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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foreveramom
Tue Mar-27-07 02:23 PM
Member since Jan 30th 2006
763 posts
#268526, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 2
That was rude and uncalled for, Ma Kettle.
Michelle is an awesome person, a real person. If you have a problem with her, PM her. Don't you dare snap back with nastiness when she's trying to apologize. How petty and thoughtless. Where have you been for the past two years?! On this board? Some would question your integrity and honesty. Don't you dare turn this around as a personal attack.
Thanks, Michelle for your candor. It takes courage to post things like this knowing that those like Ma Kettle will shoot back with nothing constructive. You are a wonderful person, and a wonderful friend.
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angeliagg
Tue Mar-27-07 02:15 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
652 posts
#268519, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
I couldn't agree more, Michelle. It sucks when you have to be afraid to post a question or a vent about an absolutely rough day. When I've got a question, I'd like realistic answers. When I've had a horribly crappy day because they're all acting like monsters (yesterday for example), I don't want cyber hugs. I want someone to say, "Yes, sometimes it just plain sucks. Sometimes they do act like complete heathens and we're all counting the minutes till bedtime." I hate the illusion that we all have to be perfect and heaven forbid I feed my kids spaghettios for lunch and didn't have the money to spend $900 on carseats. I know I'm a good mom to these kids but it's the hardest job I've ever had. I would love to see this place be more user friendly, have forums for age-groups, and be allowed to give honest advice other than cyber hugs and everything smells like roses.
GBB born Dec 27, 2005 at 31w4d
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3D Montana Mama
Tue Mar-27-07 02:20 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
430 posts
#268524, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Michelle,
I can't help but wonder who all these perfect moms are on here that you refer to. I have been here for three years and I don't see that at all. I see moms from all walks of life trying to help each other the best they know how. If you don't like a post or a poster, you can walk away. It is that simple.
I think many things get taken the wrong way without the intent of the original poster. May we all remember that we post on TC amidst the distractions of our children in the background. Let us all cut each other the slack that we deserve as we try to help each other from our busy lives.
I think the board has been especially positive and supportive lately. Let us all keep it that way! May God bless us all in our journey here.
Cynthia
DS-7/99
BBB born 8/04 at 31 4/7 weeks
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 02:25 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268528, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 5
this is a response to someone wanting the old walkers...just look a few threads down...
They changed everything about them because neglectful parents who couldn't be bothered to keep them away from stairs and dangerous areas are irresponsible. So us responsible parents who see to our own kids' safety have to deal with the regulations and gadgets designed to make up for others' failures.
I think the above post is pretty clear about where people start with being afraid to post something lest they be the "perfect parent".
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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TiffaniRay
Tue Mar-27-07 02:35 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
3803 posts
#268532, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 5
Did you not see the subject line? I do believe the word Apology is in it. That is all Michelle intended this post to be. Last time I checked the 1st amendment was still in effect. Please stop picking apart her post and let it be.
Tiffani & Ray(NJ)
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tulip
Tue Mar-27-07 03:39 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
6101 posts
#268562, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 8
Okay, since we've mentioned the First Amendment...
I agree with Cynthia. I, too, am mystified as to who the perfect moms with the perfect advice are that apparently are so hated and who apparently are forcing others to feel so bad about their lives. I have not met any pefect moms at this forum, nor would I consider myself even close to a perfect mom. I have a hard time understanding an apology that contains zingers:
"Frustrated for all the new moms that come on here looking for advice on certain subjects and only getting answers from some moms that can only give advice on how to be perfect and making the new moms and moms that have been around awhile, feel like they are not living up to the standards that they think a triplet mom should be. Which is what, really?
Frustrated for not being able to answer a question in a real manner because then I would be jumped all over, because I haven't done something like others think I should.
Frustrated because we can't discuss, disagree and then move on without our threads getting pulled, because it's not along the lines of giving hugs and support when really what the original poster wants is a real answer. We're adults, we can disagree, work it out and move on. We don't need to be censored so much that saying anything out of line just creates "drama" and then we're shut down."
============
Specifically, what kind of advice is it that is so intimidating to apparently quite a number of members here? What are the standards of a triplet mom? I've never read any here, never read any elsewhere, I am unaware of any discussions or advice offered anywhere that list standards we are supposed to live up to. I certainly am aware that I've been criticized here quite vocally & at times voraciously for giving an answer in a "real manner" or which differs from societal or triplet-cultural norms. Criticized here, plus ridiculed, mocked & derided over at the other forum (and in Yahoo groups and other forums & conversations). Gee, one can't win! Give real answers here = get jumped on here AND electronically eviscerated over there & elsewhere.
I agree that the members here need to be free to give advice that they feel could be of help. Which *to me* means, then, that we should be able to talk about housecleaning, daily schedules, recipes, and homeschooling without others mocking or hating us for being Stepford Wives. We should be able to give an answer about our views of infant care without others accusing us of "making" new moms feel a given range of destructive emotions. At the same time, I realize this is the USA and free speech is a Constitutional right we all hold dear to our hearts. If some people want to criticize and hate people so much that they have to create a special forum just to do so, okay, go ahead, but just realize that the intimidation created by that kind of behavior is just as capable of censorship as any kind of editorial or moderator-inspired delete fest.
I can accept that Michelle is feeling remorse for any part she played. I can. I hold no grudges, in my opinion we're all deeply flawed human beings. I'm just dismayed that her apology contains elements from the original "drama" that are still just as hurtful & mystifying as they have ever been. I can't help but wonder if there are some people out there who just need to let it go, so to speak, and stop getting so worked up about people/moms who give advice they don't agree with. I suspect we're all in agreement at some higher level. I just wish that agreement would trickle down to the rest of us.
(PS - For Maui DH, yes, actually, studies have been done regarding men breastfeeding babies, and with the right amount of hormones & nipple stimulation it can be done, although not in amounts which are nutritive to the baby. There are also devices which a man can wear on his chest which basically are fake boobs that you can fill with milk or formula and let the baby nurse from. So yeah, if breastfeeding is something you'd like to try, there are avenues available to you.)
Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.
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madmolly
Tue Mar-27-07 03:42 PM
Member since Oct 07th 2005
1364 posts
#268563, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 17
"(PS - For Maui DH, yes, actually, studies have been done regarding men breastfeeding babies, and with the right amount of hormones & nipple stimulation it can be done, although not in amounts which are nutritive to the baby. There are also devices which a man can wear on his chest which basically are fake boobs that you can fill with milk or formula and let the baby nurse from. So yeah, if breastfeeding is something you'd like to try, there are avenues available to you.)"
See, now there's a little bit of snarkiness in all of us! LMAO!!!
Lea
bgg 1/22/06 @ 28.3 weeks
g 6/04 @ 34 weeks
g 7/99
g 6/97
http://killertomatoandthepeapodsquad.blogspot.com/
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tulip
Tue Mar-27-07 04:07 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
6101 posts
#268578, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 18
So sorry. Was not trying to be snarky, only to share some information!
Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.
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boomom
Tue Mar-27-07 04:24 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1396 posts
#268583, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 17
Tue Mar-27-07 04:25 PM by boomom
Agreed Tulip!
I would also like to add, that if that other forum was created as a fun spoof, why the h@ll did the creator and/or moderator choose to make it accessible to the general public? What was the purpose and reason to publicly and crudely ridicule people? Help me understand.
Gina
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 04:35 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268589, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 30
>Agreed Tulip!
>I would also like to add, that if that other forum was created
>as a fun spoof, why the h@ll did the creator and/or moderator
>choose to make it accessible to the general public? What was
>the purpose and reason to publicly and crudely ridicule
>people? Help me understand.
>
>Gina
boomom--I don't think anyone can help you understand...that is not a slam either...you either get it or you don't. It's not meant to be a big "unsafe" conspiracy, it's a forum, all are welcome. If you don't like it you don't post, you don't lurk, you don't even know how to get there. There are millions of places on the internet I don't visit...but I don't complain about them...I just don't go there.
hope that helps
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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cdemp
Tue Mar-27-07 05:30 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1059 posts
#268616, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 33
The problem is not your forum. I personally don't care about that. You're right, there are millions of sites out there. Have all the fun you want. But why bring it over here? I noticed that you asked how to create a lilypie ticker. If you really want to know how to create one, then great. But if you're only do it to poke fun at the person who posted the directions a few days ago, then that's not funny anymore. At least I don't think so. Well, that's my opinion.
Bsebllmom9: If you have a legitimate question you want to ask from the veteran forum, I'm sure the vets will gladly help you. Jonib posted a question a couple of days ago, and she got a reply.
Gloria
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ZwickJB
Tue Mar-27-07 06:39 PM
Member since Sep 21st 2006
160 posts
#268639, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 35
Just to note...none of the other members brought the other site here..it was people like boomoo and mamakitten3..When they go a lurk the other site and dig up information to twist it all around. and then come over and post the links here....WE never waved in your face nor did we ask you to read it. But when people join the board, post as a member and then decide to take all/most of it out of context it becomes more than it intended to be.
People do not fail...they just give up!
~unknown~
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cdemp
Tue Mar-27-07 06:57 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1059 posts
#268646, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 42
I'll say it again. I don't care about the other site. If JoniB is really interested in creating a lilypie ticker, then great, somebody posted a link to the instructions already. -- Gloria
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ZwickJB
Tue Mar-27-07 06:58 PM
Member since Sep 21st 2006
160 posts
#268649, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 46
Thats fine if you don't care about the other site..I was just answering your question..which was "why bring it here"
People do not fail...they just give up!
~unknown~
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cdemp
Tue Mar-27-07 07:00 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1059 posts
#268651, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 48
Tue Mar-27-07 07:01 PM by cdemp
Well, it didn't answer my question, but that's okay. Thanks anyway for trying. -- Gloria
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boomom
Tue Mar-27-07 07:18 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1396 posts
#268658, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 42
Tripletdisconnection is a public forum, just as you've reminded us all.
You all make comments on that board regarding TC members and posts, why the heck can't TC members make comments regarding posts made on that forum? Who the heck is twisting information around? At least we keep it clean.
If you don't like TC members lurking and you say "oh, it's just all in fun" then make it PRIVATE and quit complaining over here.
Gina
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 07:26 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268660, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 53
>Tripletdisconnection is a public forum, just as you've
>reminded us all.
>
>You all make comments on that board regarding TC members and
>posts, why the heck can't TC members make comments regarding
>posts made on that forum? Who the heck is twisting information
>around? At least we keep it clean.
>
>If you don't like TC members lurking and you say "oh, it's
>just all in fun" then make it PRIVATE and quit complaining
>over here.
>
>Gina
boomom
think about what you just said will ya??? you come over to a forum you clearly don't like, you(under a different user id) say stuff to get people riled up, you send nasty pm's and then you run back to TC to talk about complaining.
Does something have to be PRIVATE for you to keep yourself away from it?? Not a single member of TDC gave info or provided the links here on TC...hmmmmm, now at least we admit we do drama over there. Why can't you admit same?
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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boomom
Tue Mar-27-07 08:08 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1396 posts
#268673, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 54
I would like to see proof of all that you accuse me of.
The only thing I have been guilty of is lurking.
Gina
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 06:55 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268644, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 35
>The problem is not your forum. I personally don't care about
>that. You're right, there are millions of sites out there.
>Have all the fun you want. But why bring it over here? I
>noticed that you asked how to create a lilypie ticker. If you
>really want to know how to create one, then great. But if
>you're only do it to poke fun at the person who posted the
>directions a few days ago, then that's not funny anymore. At
>least I don't think so. Well, that's my opinion.
>
>Bsebllmom9: If you have a legitimate question you want to ask
>from the veteran forum, I'm sure the vets will gladly help
>you. Jonib posted a question a couple of days ago, and she
>got a reply.
>
>Gloria
I still don't know how to do a lily pie sticker
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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cdemp
Tue Mar-27-07 06:58 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1059 posts
#268648, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 44
Me neither. They're kind of cute, but I'm not into stuff like that. -- Gloria
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3D Montana Mama
Tue Mar-27-07 02:58 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
430 posts
#268545, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 5
Michelle,
I am sorry. Offense on my part was neither implied nor intended in any way. Thanks.
Cynthia
DS-7/99
BBB born 8/04 at 31 4/7 weeks
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CrunchyMomto3
Tue Mar-27-07 02:37 PM
Member since Mar 27th 2007
11 posts
#268533, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
I'm new to this board (just joined today) and have no idea what was going on and really don't want to know. I'm here for support and to offer/receive advice. I hope what ever happened can be put behind and we can concentrate on the issues at hand...the raising of our children.
Jenny
Attached Mama to Irish Triplets:
Haley, Ella & Ronin
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foreveramom
Tue Mar-27-07 02:53 PM
Member since Jan 30th 2006
763 posts
#268543, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 9
Crunchy mom? I noticed your signature said Irish Triplets. Are you referring to their heritage? Just curious what you mean. Also want to understand why you're posting on this one, but haven't posted an introduction about yourself or your family. Seems a bit odd.
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CrunchyMomto3
Tue Mar-27-07 03:03 PM
Member since Mar 27th 2007
11 posts
#268549, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 11
>Crunchy mom? I noticed your signature said Irish Triplets.
>Are you referring to their heritage? Just curious what you
>mean. Also want to understand why you're posting on this one,
>but haven't posted an introduction about yourself or your
>family. Seems a bit odd.
I didn't realize that there was a forum somewhere to post an introduction. Can you point me in the right direction?
Jenny
Attached Mama to Irish Triplets:
Haley, Ella & Ronin
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Lynnieg123
Tue Mar-27-07 03:13 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
45 posts
#268556, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 11
Are we supposed to post an introduction to ourselves and our families? I never did but didn't know it was expected.
Mom to bgg triplets born 4/9/05; Owen, Arden, & Morgan
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tulip
Tue Mar-27-07 04:02 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
6101 posts
#268576, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
No, you do not have to post an introduction. It is nice, but it is not required or expected.
Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.
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HOWMANY
Tue Mar-27-07 02:50 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
835 posts
#268539, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Amy
Wife to Jason(pixelpusher)
Mom to Gwynne, Connor, Chloe 11/03/03
25wks 1day
www.caringbridge.org/visit/connorferris
http://lilypie.com>
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tripletots98
Tue Mar-27-07 03:03 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1184 posts
#268548, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Thanks Michelle!
I think your thoughts & apology in this post were well thought out & well worded. I admire you for WANTING to post this, rather than HAVING to. You displayed alot of courage & said exactly what other members may have felt but were afraid to say!
You are right on target here, while some members may not intentionally sound 'perfect' or 'rude' in their choice of words, sometimes the post does 'read' that way.
I hope your apology is accepted for just what it is, an HONEST, OPEN apology.
FYI: just to note to anyone reading this thread, I am also a participating member of the SPOOF forum and I am comfortable there, just as I am here, at TC.
Amy~
Paige, Austin & Hailee - 8yrs
10/29/98 34w1d
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DebM
Tue Mar-27-07 03:10 PM
Member since Mar 31st 2006
471 posts
#268553, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
I didn't see much of an apology other than the first sentence. Everything else was an explanation of what you don't like about TC which you certainly have the right to express. It seems heartfelt and I respect that.
Just keep in mind that moms aren't trying to be perfect. Aren't all answers welcome? Can't we pick and choose the answers we think will work for our situation? I'll never be as organized or offer the most healthy snacks for my kids, but I don't mind reading how other people do it. I'm not left to feel like I'm a bad mom because of it. I would like to see moms be able to give answers without being picked on or made fun of.
Luke- 4lb,12oz
Wade - 3lb,4oz
Zoe - 5lb,2oz
Born at 34 weeks
http://www.totsites.com/tot/ourtrio
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Mamakitten3
Tue Mar-27-07 03:45 PM
Member since May 29th 2006
346 posts
#268564, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Tue Mar-27-07 03:49 PM by Mamakitten3
I just want everyone to be aware of that everything you post now is subjected to be made fun of on their forum www.tripletdisconnection.com
We are no longer safe to post about fears with our children, marriage or family without the possiblity of being ridiculed.
This forum isnt about being perfect. I cant think of one mom who claims to be perfect. Some just look on the sunnier side of the street than others. Why should this site bow down to what you want and need? When it does meet the needs of so many.
If you have some advice that you think wont go over well, why dont you just PM posters? That would probably save alot of time and hurt feelings.
Sunshine and Roses,
Lauren
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tripletots98
Tue Mar-27-07 03:51 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1184 posts
#268566, "Why?!?!?!?!"
In response to Reply # 19
Why do you have to go there Lauren? Why not just ACCEPT (or NOT) this post for what it is? Why not ignore the thread completely? Why not take your own advice and PM Michelle? Why? I just don't get it!?!?! WHY?
Amy~
Paige, Austin & Hailee - 8yrs
10/29/98 34w1d
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madmolly
Tue Mar-27-07 03:57 PM
Member since Oct 07th 2005
1364 posts
#268569, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 19
Tue Mar-27-07 04:57 PM by madmolly
Seriously? Come over to TDC and enjoy yourself or just shut up about it already.
You and Boomom and always in the middle of the drama!! You two are worse then all the TDC girls combined! Drama, drama, drama...
Lea
bgg 1/22/06 @ 28.3 weeks
g 6/04 @ 34 weeks
g 7/99
g 6/97
http://killertomatoandthepeapodsquad.blogspot.com/
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julytrips
Tue Mar-27-07 06:06 PM
Member since Mar 25th 2007
10 posts
#268626, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 23
Why? beacuse they don't agree with you? That is not a fair statement.
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tripletots98
Tue Mar-27-07 06:13 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1184 posts
#268630, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 36
>Why? beacuse they don't agree with you? That is not a fair
>statement.
"If you have some advice that you think wont go over well, why dont you just PM posters? That would probably save alot of time and hurt feelings."
The above quote is "Why?" the actions taken & words of 'advice' offered by the poster, are contradictory to each other. So, Yes, I think it's fair to ask!
Amy~
Paige, Austin & Hailee - 8yrs
10/29/98 34w1d
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julytrips
Tue Mar-27-07 06:19 PM
Member since Mar 25th 2007
10 posts
#268631, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 38
yes your probably right. My apologies. But why then can Mad MOlly say nasty things about boo mom and others and not PM them? Just confused.
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tulip
Tue Mar-27-07 06:31 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
6101 posts
#268635, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 39
You're not the only one confused as to why anyone - I don't care who it is - can be permitted to tell another forum member to "shut up" on the public forum. You are also not the only one confused as to how it is okay for anyone - I don't care who - to say that some forum members are "worse than" other people on the public forum or a different forum. It is all quite confusing to me.
Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.
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madmolly
Tue Mar-27-07 06:37 PM
Member since Oct 07th 2005
1364 posts
#268638, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 39
Tue Mar-27-07 06:38 PM by madmolly
I never told you to PM them. I never told them to PM them. You guys like drama and you like it on the board. Silly! Then you complain about the drama, as if you weren't right in the middle.
Then there is you, specifically. You make up a silly name and come on to the board to cause drama. Then you email me and say nasty things. Then you email others and say nasty things. But if it comes back your direction, you cry and look for sympathy. Well, Jac, or Giddymom, or Julymom...who ever you are, if one doesn't like the drama then they should stop jumping in the middle of it!
LOL, silly girl!!
Oh, and I apologize for the "shut up aleady" comment that has offended you so greatly. I ammend that to say "please be quiet about it already." Better? LMAO!!!
Lea
bgg 1/22/06 @ 28.3 weeks
g 6/04 @ 34 weeks
g 7/99
g 6/97
http://killertomatoandthepeapodsquad.blogspot.com/
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 03:58 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268571, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 19
>I just want everyone to be aware of that everything you post
>now is subjected to be made fun of on their forum
>www.tripletdisconnection.com
>
>We are no longer safe to post about fears with our children,
>marriage or family without the possiblity of being ridiculed.
>
>
>This forum isnt about being perfect. I cant think of one mom
>who claims to be perfect. Some just look on the sunnier side
>of the street than others. Why should this site bow down to
>what you want and need? When it does meet the needs of so
>many.
>
>If you have some advice that you think wont go over well, why
>dont you just PM posters? That would probably save alot of
>time and hurt feelings.
>
>Sunshine and Roses,
>Lauren
Oh please...you are "safe" no one is going to make you "unsafe"...being ridiculed does not = being unsafe...lighten up...you've obviously been and have participated. I enjoy the lightheartedness of the site, so do many others. We like to come to both sites, we don't all agree...Michelle did what she felt was right by posting, now it's getting picked apart...ya'll wonder why we make fun. geesh!
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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kmoore
Tue Mar-27-07 03:50 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
88 posts
#268565, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Welcome back Michelle! I don't even know that apology was needed but you say it perfectly...
Accept it or don't, take it or leave it!
PEOPLE: if you don't like it, don't accept it, LEAVE it and move on so we can use the board for its intended purpose. This is beyond exhausting.
Kmoore
Mommy to Abigail, Sean and Maggie born 3/5/04 at 35 weeks
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DebM
Tue Mar-27-07 04:01 PM
Member since Mar 31st 2006
471 posts
#268573, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 20
Are we not entitled to give our opinion?
Are we only supposed to say " way to go, high five, you're great"? Some how I'm sensing a double standard here.
Luke- 4lb,12oz
Wade - 3lb,4oz
Zoe - 5lb,2oz
Born at 34 weeks
http://www.totsites.com/tot/ourtrio
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boomom
Tue Mar-27-07 03:56 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1396 posts
#268568, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
"Frustrated that there is an exclusive group on here that think because their triplets are older, they're better than the rest of us! Heaven forbid we go and ask them a question that they've dealt with before. Let's help each other out and not cut each other down every chance we get."
Gee, I did a search on the Vet's forum and I cannot even find anything that resembles your disdain of the "exclusive" group. According to a post that you started you thought we were all a "hoot".
Fwiw, I'll leave it. "A dollar and a day too short". Or maybe I am just too much of a _____'tard. That was on behalf of my daughter, she sends lots of love.
This will probably get pulled as there seems to be somewhat of a hierarchy on TC lately. I few of us have a running bet on whose posts get pulled or moved to another forum.
Gina
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tulip
Tue Mar-27-07 04:29 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
6101 posts
#268586, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 22
Wish I could send you a PM or email.
Tulip & The Three Amigos
GBG born at 35w5d on December 31, 2002 - Happy New Year's Eve!!!
YES! You *can* breastfeed triplets!!!
I am a Velveteen Rabbit, and the birth, love, kisses & magic that are my children has made me Real.
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julytrips
Tue Mar-27-07 06:09 PM
Member since Mar 25th 2007
10 posts
#268628, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 22
I'm sorry Gina. That word is a disgrace and says so much about the people that use it.
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CrunchyMomto3
Tue Mar-27-07 04:02 PM
Member since Mar 27th 2007
11 posts
#268574, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Oh my, my first day here and this is what I come into.
I've made it nearly 39 months without being in a triplet group and found you guys on accident while doing an internet search for a triple bike trailer.
I think I'm better off alone in my own little world. Way too busy for such bickering.
How do I delete my account?
Jenny
Attached Mama to Irish Triplets:
Haley, Ella & Ronin
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TripletDad2005
Tue Mar-27-07 04:02 PM
Member since Oct 03rd 2006
40 posts
#268575, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Well said Michelle. I've always found your posts interesting and informative. Your honesty and candor is appreciated.
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kylamel
Tue Mar-27-07 04:09 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1499 posts
#268579, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Well-written Michelle!!!
From another formerly "banned" person - I agree with Michelle.
NONE of us are perfect.
Michelle apologized. Interesting to see who is not accepting the apology.. hmmmm..
((((HUGSSS))) Michelle!!
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ShanAZ
Tue Mar-27-07 04:31 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
698 posts
#268588, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Well said. An honest apology listing your feelings and frustrations. Just as people are listing theirs for accepting or not accepting. FWIW, I visit the spoof forum and find alot of it absolutely hilarious. If I think it's over the top, I just skip it. Just as I would skip comments made here that I don't agree with.
ggg, 25 weekers
Nov, 2005
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Annie3
Tue Mar-27-07 05:24 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
551 posts
#268613, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Thank you for saying things others are afraid of and thank you for apologizing I don't know what for but want to thank you for your opinions and advice.
I am sorry it had to turn into this. Why, do we riducle a post of an apologize, attack a new person and turn it into drama???
Annie
Born 6/19/05 @ 32 Weeks
Kylie Mae 2lbs 13oz
Ashby Ray 3lbs 5oz
Eadan Sean 3lbs 2oz
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ZwickJB
Tue Mar-27-07 06:40 PM
Member since Sep 21st 2006
160 posts
#268640, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Kudos! Michelle that was a VERY noble thing to do, no matter what others may say to shoot you down...need not worry you still have wings!
People do not fail...they just give up!
~unknown~
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tripplefun
Tue Mar-27-07 06:56 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
832 posts
#268645, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Michelle. Very well said. Like another poster you did not have to post this, you posted it because you wanted to. I too feel exactly how you do and so many others.
In my experience here (over 7 years) ive posted many many posts. If its slightly negative, perhaps about how bad my kids have been for a day or even a week, no matter if its a vent or a question or suggestions I either get no responses or very few. I am not perfect, we dont have alot of dough, cant afford for my kids to go on real vacations, or do extra curicular activities. Because of this, and alot more I didnt even mention,, parents like us are looked down upon. I have never ever gotten any really good support from anyone here, period. Now if i post that my kids are thriving, above average in school, doing this or that then i'd get a ton of responses. Ive never felt that ive fit in here, ever, the vets board is just as bad. There is an elete group there, when I have responded to someone, or answered a general post I get skipped past, like i didnt even post. Not saying everytime but its happened. Do i get on here and complain? NO, do I participate like I'd like to on the vets board? No. These are just some examples of what Michelle is talking about, im not referring to any one poster, just things that popped in my head as I type this.
I have had 2 posts in the past few weeks that have been pulled. Both being a post asking how a particular member was doing, surgery, not doing well afterwards, it was pulled, the same thing happened several weeks ago, I still dont have an explanation from the moderators as to why they were pulled, there are many many posters that have posted exactly what ive posted yet there posts have never been pulled. This is just another example of what Michelle is trying to say.
Yes i too agree that there are a few members here that like to keep the fire lit under certain posts, maybe they have too much time on there hands, bored, not sure, but again if you dont like it, feel negative about it dont post. In my experience here there are quite a few hypocrits here, and yes I will spell any word any way i'd like.
There are alot of things that could be changed here, i agree but im not in charge of this board, all we can do is make suggestions, in my experience in the past it usually doesnt get far but its worth a try.
Im me, to the point and say it like it is, dont care if anyone here likes me, thats evident over 7 years that i must not be a likeable person as ive got maybe 2 close friends here, doesnt matter, this is the internet. Im very greatful for there friendship, I hope to meet a few select members from here someday, the ones that have tried to get rid of me doesnt matter, I will continue to post.
Thank u Michelle for posting this. You know I value your advice, you have been a very active member, with alot of great advice.
Sorry this got so long and was a bit about me, but in my experience here this is what I have personally gone through, i have tough skin, doesnt bother me but no one will convince me otherwise the clicks,,, yes i can spell it like that if i'd like,, are here and unfort. always will be.
Sandy, mom to
Matt just turned 18, It cant be, my baby cannot be 18 already!
We just had a birthday
Sydney 7
Morgan 7
Cade 7
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foreveramom
Tue Mar-27-07 07:04 PM
Member since Jan 30th 2006
763 posts
#268653, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 45
Sandy, you're awesome!
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tripplefun
Tue Mar-27-07 07:04 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
832 posts
#268652, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
Something else I thought I'd enlighten all of you that are up in arms about the spoof forum. In my experience mind you, several yahoo groups that ive been a member of in the past have in deed made fun of quite a few members here, so tell me what the difference is, between yahoo group members doing it or a spoof forum where we can complain about our kids, daily lives, husbands, friends, etc, and the spoof forum? I'll tell you what the difference is. None of you know about all that, no one runs back here and says so and so is talking about you on another board.
I pulled myself out of at least 3 multiples groups because if lying hypocrits. Omg if anyone talked about me its not the end of the world. Its life. Period
We talk negatively about our husbands, inlaws, friends on here, no biggie. Its life ladies,, and gents.
Sandy, mom to
Matt just turned 18, It cant be, my baby cannot be 18 already!
We just had a birthday
Sydney 7
Morgan 7
Cade 7
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 07:13 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268656, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 50
great job Sandy...although I still don't have a lily pie ticker
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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6BlueEyes
Tue Mar-27-07 07:51 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
183 posts
#268668, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
What about this post is so important that it gets pinned? Although it has some points that may be helpful if changes are being considered for tc, for most triplet moms coming to the site, it does not have very much practical information to warrant being pinned. Talk about moderating inconsistencies!
It is obvious that the original poster spent a lot of time thinking about things that she thinks would make this a better forum. That is great and hopefully will be helpful to the "powers that be". I do have to disagree with those that consider the post to be an apology. It seems like she is just sorry that the board is not meeting her expectations. I did not read anything about her being sorry for something that she did wrong.
As for the "perfect moms that control the board". I am confused. Unless you are referring to a small number of characters that do seem to have rather large egos, I think that most people just respond to the things that were successful for them. We all have things that we are good at and things that we are not so good at. I surely would not respond to someone asking for advice on getting babies to sleep through the night because, quite honestly, I kinda suck at it. But, I have had some success and learned a lot in other areas. If I respond to those posts, I would hate to think that people think that I feel that I am a perfect mom. I think that most people come to tc to look for new ideas and ways to do things better. It is unfair to say that people that answer their posts only do so because they are trying to show everyone that they are "perfect moms"...except for a few, of course
I really don't feel that everything should be sunshine all the time on this board. I am quite often really disappointed with this board when someone says something that I feel is ludicrous and nobody challenges them. I wish there was more good-natured discussion and debate on this board. However, since this whole thing has started, I think things have gotten even worse. Now, people are just being mean and nasty. I hope everything improves soon.
Kelly
Ben, Jack & Drew 05/28/02
Charlie 07/06/06
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jonib
Tue Mar-27-07 08:04 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
262 posts
#268671, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 55
I would think it was originally pinned because it was an open apology from Michelle as well as suggestions for improvement. It's not the mod's fault it all went downhill from there...
Jonib
mom to
Abby
Andy
Caroline
33 weeks 11/20/05
Rhett 9
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Triplethefun04
Tue Mar-27-07 08:08 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
63 posts
#268674, "RE: An Apology From Bsebllmom9"
In response to Reply # 0
WOW, thank you all for your replies! I feel the love, really I do. I hope we can all be friends now and move past this, now that we've all said our peace or piece.
Please feel free to email me any time at bsebllmom9@sbcglobal.net
You guys rock!
Michelle
(formerly known as bsebllmom9 )
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