May 9 2007 Cat Apology

Subject: "Apology" Previous topic | Next topic


Catw3kittens
Tue May-08-07 02:18 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
3731 posts


#276727, "Apology"

I would like to apologize to everyone who has been offended by my recent posts. I received a private mail alerting me to the fact that I have been perceived as touting the abilities of my children at the expense of those mothers who have children struggling with delays. Apparently this has garnered me special "air time" on private e-mails and has hurt some feelings.

My posts that mentioned my children's skills were intended to emphasize either the amazing impacts of EFA on children's abilities (something that I'm very outspoken about and tried on my children on a whim based upon what I was reading about EFA here on TC regarding speech delays), or to emphasize the fact that children born at 31 weeks can walk away completely unscathed. Apparently my intentions were not clear enough and all that was heard was how terribly pleased I am with my children.

Quite honestly, I am terribly pleased with my children. They are the sunshine of my life, but they would be no less that if they were struggling with delays and my focus was in helping them overcome obstacles.

I know that some of us who have lost babies can get our feelings hurt when folks get into the "triplets only" debates and point out that having two is not the same as having three, even though nobody here intends to be saying that those of us who have lost children are not triplet mothers. Frankly, I do not care what delays I might have been dealing with, I would give anything I own, everything I own, to have my Carina with us right now.

Anyway, I hope that everyone knows that I have no intention of "bragging" about my children, and that is not where my heart has been. If it has seemed this way, please forgive me and overlook my failure to comprehend how my posts would be taken.

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.
It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

http://b3.lilypie.com/bDA

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Replies to this topic


RE: Apology, pixilee, May 08th 2007, #1
RE: Apology, mtmonkeys, May 08th 2007, #2
RE: Apology, MSTAR, May 08th 2007, #3
RE: Apology, VonWasden, May 08th 2007, #9
RE: Apology, DebM, May 08th 2007, #4
RE: Apology, jonib, May 08th 2007, #5
RE: Apology, smileysunshine, May 08th 2007, #7
RE: Apology, Catw3kittens, May 08th 2007, #10
RE: Apology, atkindred, May 08th 2007, #6
RE: Apology, jenniferl, May 08th 2007, #8
RE: Apology, Derys, May 08th 2007, #11
RE: Apology, Tracey, May 08th 2007, #12
RE: Apology, Teamtriple, May 08th 2007, #13
RE: Apology, Annie3, May 08th 2007, #14
RE: Apology, Catw3kittens, May 08th 2007, #18
RE: Apology, Annie3, May 08th 2007, #22
RE: Apology, Catw3kittens, May 08th 2007, #23
RE: Apology, MSTAR, May 08th 2007, #24
RE: Apology, fivenelli, May 08th 2007, #26
RE: Apology, tripplefun, May 08th 2007, #27
RE: Apology, tripletots98, May 08th 2007, #29
RE: Apology, jonib, May 08th 2007, #30
RE: Apology, jonib, May 08th 2007, #28
RE: Apology, Ma Kettle, May 08th 2007, #15
RE: Apology, tripletots98, May 08th 2007, #17
RE: Apology, 6BlueEyes, May 08th 2007, #16
RE: Apology, fivenelli, May 08th 2007, #20
RE: Apology, naynay, May 08th 2007, #21
RE: Apology, Rosemarie3, May 08th 2007, #19
RE: Apology, tripplefun, May 08th 2007, #25
RE: Apology, DebM, May 08th 2007, #31
RE: Apology, Tasha, May 08th 2007, #32
RE: Apology, fivenelli, May 09th 2007, #33



pixilee
Tue May-08-07 02:59 PM
Member since Oct 25th 2005
1095 posts


#276737, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

((HUGS))!
Jonna

Daylan 13
Austin 9
Abegail (Stillborn Angel 4/16/05)
Jackson, Ella, Landon 1/10/06 @ 27 wks



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mtmonkeys
Tue May-08-07 03:09 PM
Member since Jan 04th 2007
70 posts


#276739, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Cat Im so sorry that people have taken your touting the wrong way. You have every right to brag about your children as all parents do.

HUGS

Ann
GGB 22.5m
G 10y G 11Y

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MSTAR
Tue May-08-07 03:09 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
893 posts


#276741, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

I'm a little confused by this post. Are you apologizing for having SMART kids? Someone is making you feel bad because your kids are SMART? Someone is OFFENDED because your kids are SMART?

Because that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. My kids are smart too. Incidentally, I give mine fish oil too. I have no idea if that's why they are smart. Maybe they are just genetically smart. Maybe it has to do with the fish oil. Maybe it has to do with the HOURS AND HOURS of time I spend working with them EVERY SINGLE DAY. Whatever it is, I would never apologize for it.

I say GOOD FOR YOU FOR HAVING SMART KIDS!!! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

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VonWasden
Tue May-08-07 04:40 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
2111 posts


#276763, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 3

I was confused on this as well. It is hard to imagine that anyone would feel hurt or slighted that someone has children who are doing well. It smacks of petty envy and isn't becoming to anyone on this board. I may be missing the picture here, but is this really happening? I brag about my kids all the time, I brag about my pregnancy and delivery and all sorts of things related to my trio plus one. I don't think I am taking credit for it, because I truly know that I have been blessed immensely with all of it. I do like to share because I think I am the outside edge of the curve, and I like for newbies to know that it is possible to go "full-term" and have huge babies without NICU time. I don't pretend it was anything I did or did not do that got us there, simply the power of God (or luck if you will). I also brag because I love my children and am proud of them. So, brag on Mommies and lets move on.
Kim
Nate, Nick & Noel(36w4d)and Nia.

http://www.tickercentral.com>

http://lilypie.com>

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DebM
Tue May-08-07 03:17 PM
Member since Mar 31st 2006
621 posts


#276743, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Cat - You should not have been singled out for trying to praise the affects of EFA or expressing your feelings over how your children are doing. So sorry someone did that to you. I can't believe someone would get offended over someone posting about the success of their child.





Luke- 4lb,12oz
Wade - 3lb,4oz
Zoe - 5lb,2oz
Born at 34 weeks




http://www.totsites.com/tot/ourtrio

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jonib
Tue May-08-07 03:52 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
451 posts


#276754, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0
Tue May-08-07 04:11 PM by jonib

I'll be the first to say I don't even know what EFA is so I can't relate.

I would hope everyone is terribly pleased with their own children as well, we all face different obstacles.

I have noticed you tend to post responses/suggestions to those struggling with issues specifically relating to 3 children the same age. While I know you consider yourself a triplet mom and as you posted would give anything to have your daughter with you, the struggles are simply different and at times your advice is just not doable based on the fact that the original poster was talking about dealing with 3 children versus two.

Before I get flamed, let me state that I am not saying anything ugly or saying that anyone does not belong here, I'm simply pointing out that when seeking advice re: dealing with 3 and the logistics of 3, and how you leave the house with 3, etc. etc, etc, it is very, very different.

My two cents on why you may get the feedback that you get sometimes.

sorry--edited where I said "no one" to say "anyone"


Jonib
16 month old cuties, Abby, Andy and Caroline
Rhett 9

no, I can't get the lily pie to work

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smileysunshine
Tue May-08-07 04:19 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
109 posts


#276760, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 5

I don't post much but I can't believe you just wrote that! To say that Cat can't understand 3 vs 2 is a horrible thing to say to a triplet mom that has lost one of her children. I have never spoken to Cat but she has said a lot of great things over the years and I decided to come out of "lurkdum" to say that just because she has different perspectives doesn't mean that her feelings and frustrations are needed on this board. You might want to read what you wrote and remember what your mom said "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".


dawn
Andrew, Emma, Benjamin 5 years old

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Catw3kittens
Tue May-08-07 04:43 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
3731 posts


#276764, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 5

"While I know you consider yourself a triplet mom..."

Wow.

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atkindred
Tue May-08-07 04:13 PM
Member since Feb 03rd 2006
80 posts


#276759, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Brag on!
B 8/02
B 9/03
spontaneous GBG 3/06 at 35 weeks

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jenniferl
Tue May-08-07 04:39 PM
Member since Jun 25th 2006
94 posts


#276762, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

I heard a phrase a long time ago that has helped me NOT take offense to other peoples happiness and success. That phrase was "Blowing out someone else’s candle will never make yours shine any brighter". That means your successes or failures have nothing to do with mine. You don't have to fail for me to feel like I succeed etc.

So I can be happy for you AND I can be happy for me! I think some people still think that if you do bad it will make them feel better and that is not your problem.


Jennifer

Lauren 10/26/90
Zoe 2/7/92
Lilliana Bliss 4 lbs 11 oz
Lucky Ryder 4 lbs 2 oz
Cash Lee 4 lbs 11.5 oz



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Derys
Tue May-08-07 04:46 PM
Member since Apr 13th 2006
75 posts


#276765, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0
Tue May-08-07 04:51 PM by Derys

Cat, I don't think you need to apologize.
I want to thank you for recommending the Coromega. I started my kids on it and I can see an improvement already. If it wasn't for you and the wonderful women on this board I don't think I would have purchased the supplement.
I'm sorry about your baby girl.
Don't let people discourage you, you have a lot to teach us.
Thank you for your advice.

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Tracey
Tue May-08-07 04:46 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
2088 posts


#276766, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Brag away, sugar! You're in good company We all deserve to have mommy brag moments. We each have different parenting highlights and parenting struggles. Don't let the struggles of others inhibit pride for your child's natural abilities.

I have five kiddos. One of whom is genius IQ; four athletes. I'll brag on 'em, and complain about their childish behavior. No matter what their skills, they are CHILDREN and we love 'em and want to share in their joyish occasions

If you want to gloat, use the Vets Forum. We want to hear what the kiddos are doing (but save the potty talk for elsewhere!~LOL)
Tracey

Michael (10)
Francesca (9)
Matthew, Alexis & Gabrielle (7)
Torunn (Norwegian DD,19)
Johannes (upcoming German DS,15)

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Teamtriple
Tue May-08-07 05:03 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
41 posts


#276768, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 12

I think that everyone needs to take a deep breath. Maybe even re-read what was said by jonib in her post. She was not saying that she didn't enjoy hearing Cat brag, she stated that WHEN and WHERE she chose to do this was the issue. As far as Cat not being a triplet mom, well, she is. HOWEVER she IS rasing two children. It is not the same no matter what you "friends of hers would like to think. That is like saying that I have 6 children that I am currently rasing instead of five. I lost a baby during my quad pregnancty, but I am NOT rasing quads. As hard as that is for me, it is true. NOT NOT NOT the same. So before you ladies start something out of nothing, just remember that the emotions are different when reading something in a post than they may have been coming from the person that posted it. You read whatever emothions into it that you wish.


Tracy
Proud Mom to Triplets Plus Two....
Shelby, Jerry, Taylor
Jeremy and Sierra

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Annie3
Tue May-08-07 05:06 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
615 posts


#276769, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Cat,

Like you I researched the EFA and started to give it my kids and have seen vast imporvements and will brag on my kids at any chance that is given, as long as it is at an appropriate time. Most of the time if it gets into a competitive parenting debate or out shine situation I back away and wait for another opening. I feel that we all are proud of our kids and want to share in our triumphs, joys, fears and setbacks and loss with others that can relate. That is why we come to this board so we can do that.

This part of your Apology does not seem sincere or appropriate in my mind:

"I received a private mail alerting me to the fact that I have been perceived as touting the abilities of my children at the expense of those mothers who have children struggling with delays. Apparently this has garnered me special "air time" on private e-mails and has hurt some feelings."

I view this as you are proud of that fact and are not feeling any remorse in causing these feeligs.

"My posts that mentioned my children's skills were intended to emphasize either the amazing impacts of EFA on children's abilities (something that I'm very outspoken about and tried on my children on a whim based upon what I was reading about EFA here on TC regarding speech delays), or to emphasize the fact that children born at 31 weeks can walk away completely unscathed. Apparently my intentions were not clear enough and all that was heard was how terribly pleased I am with my children."

I think what gets me is the comment on "children born at 31 weeks can walk away completely unscathed." I don't see how you can say that, your children are three and there are issues that can develop later. My DH has the wonderful job of dealing with these issues and watching a perfectly adjusted child have something go wrong and end up seating the child in a wheel chair. There are success stories and there are kids where gestational age does not have an impact on their lives but their are kids who do and end up with them at later ages. For you, for me, for my friends here who have kids lucky enough to not have run into those situations yet I say were pretty damn lucky and for those of you who have I say your pretty damn lucky as well, because anyway we look at it we love our children no matter what.

The only question I have is, Why if this was sent privately wasn't it answered privately instead of on this forum? If I sent a PM and it was answered in this condescending way I would be offended. If you struck a nerve with the person who wrote this PM and those feelings were expressed privately why would you write an open apology and bring it here. I would feel hurt and offended if I wrote an email to someone and they did this to me. I would have tried to ask why and how I offended them privately, seen if maybe what I did could have been taken in that context and dealt with it and gone on, all I can see is this starting up drama and making people like me get upset over something I didn't need to hear but hit a nerve so now I have a right to express my opinion on the subject, since it is no longer a private issue.

For all you out there ready to blast me go ahead. I have sat back to long and let these things fly as my DH walks into the house with another story of kid where something went wrong and the Doctor, therapist or him could figure out what it was because they were fine the day before. So just be thankful for what you have and love them with all your heart.

Born 6/19/05 @ 32 Weeks
Kylie Mae 2lbs 13oz
Ashby Ray 3lbs 5oz
Eadan Sean 3lbs 2oz

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Catw3kittens
Tue May-08-07 05:29 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
3731 posts


#276778, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 14

I'm not going to blast you. I found your response to be very well written, even though I disagree with you.

The one question that I will respond to is

"Why if this was sent privately wasn't it answered privately instead of on this forum? If I sent a PM and it was answered in this condescending way I would be offended."

First, my response was not condescending. It is genuine. If you remain unimpressed by the fact that I would never deliberately hurt anyone who is dealing with delays in their children, then so be it. But, I am genuinely aggrieved to learn that this resulted in hurt to others and also resulted in discreet conversations against me personally. If all of this seems insincere to you, I don't know what I can do to change that. I would note, however, that since you are not one of those to whom the apology was proferred, this does not present a problem.

The response was not answered privately because the person who sent the response claimed not to have been injured by me. Instead, that person (like you) assured me that her children are extremely gifted, and simply told me that I had seriously injured other people. Since this person told me that there was no apology owed to her, it seemed wrong to ignore the injury I had visited on others and simply go forward without an apology.

The apology is sincere and I stand by it. I would never knowingly make anyone else feel bad.

BTW, I can only speak to my children's status at three years old. Yes, it's possible that we can have a complete meltdown in another three years. Stick around...

But, I can honestly say that (a) even if that happens, I'll continue to adore my children and brag on all of their accomplishments, even if that is relearning how to walk; and, (b) it won't prevent me from proclaiming the possibilities for hope in the interim, or even thereafter.

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.
It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

http://b3.lilypie.com/bDA

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Annie3
Tue May-08-07 06:08 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
615 posts


#276786, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 18

I was not bragging on my kids just letting you know I did the fish oil route therfore admitting they had speach delays.

The thing is and I may only speak for myself but I find some of your writing skill a little above my head. As I accept your words of praise on my writing skills I am going to give you advice that may prevent this from happening in the future. They are from George Orwell's 5 rules to better writing from his 1946 essay, Politics and the English Language, although their are really six.

"1. Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.

2. Never use a long word where a short one will do.

3. If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

4. Never use the passive where you can use the active.

5. Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.

6. Break any of these rules sooner than saying anything outright barbarous."

I use these rules alot as I do not want to either intentionally or unintentionally give the wrong impression.

Annie

Born 6/19/05 @ 32 Weeks
Kylie Mae 2lbs 13oz
Ashby Ray 3lbs 5oz
Eadan Sean 3lbs 2oz

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Catw3kittens
Tue May-08-07 06:14 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
3731 posts


#276788, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 22

Thank you for your nice response.

I've sent you a PM...

Cat w/3 Kittens
Caidan, Carina and Caeleigh
Born at 31 weeks, 1/8/04.
It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. In memory of Carina, who was greatly loved.

http://b3.lilypie.com/bDA

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MSTAR
Tue May-08-07 07:38 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
893 posts


#276795, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 23

Cat,

In other words, dumb it down for the illiterates. You are apparantly offending them too.
Michele
Sarah, Gregory, Amanda
born 1/22/04 at 35w1d

Our surprise baby Austin born 06/15/2005

www.fourtimesthefun.blogspot.com

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fivenelli
Tue May-08-07 07:42 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
205 posts


#276797, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 24

Very nice.
Jeanne
Mommy to Frank, Grace & Sarah 1/18/02

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tripplefun
Tue May-08-07 07:44 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
876 posts


#276798, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 24

Is there a reason you have to attempt to be a smart A$$? No one is being rude, other than you. And you wonder why no one posts here anymore. Spell check works wonders. hmmmmmmmmm
Sandy, mom to

Matt just turned 18, It cant be, my baby cannot be 18 already!

We just had a birthday
Sydney 7
Morgan 7
Cade 7

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tripletots98
Tue May-08-07 08:06 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1260 posts


#276805, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 24

>Cat,
>
>In other words, dumb it down for the illiterates. You are
>apparantly offending them too.

See...now that is just RUDE! Why do you feel the need to call names? RUDE!

Amy~
Paige, Austin & Hailee - 8yrs
10/29/98 34w1d

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jonib
Tue May-08-07 08:14 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
451 posts


#276806, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 24

>Cat,
>
>In other words, dumb it down for the illiterates. You are
>apparantly offending them too.


I think you just dumbed it down with your poor spelling. You always show up to blast others and really add nothing to the mix.
Jonib
16 month old cuties, Abby, Andy and Caroline
Rhett 9

no, I can't get the lily pie to work

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jonib
Tue May-08-07 07:46 PM
Member since Oct 11th 2005
451 posts


#276799, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 23

I posted what I thought was blunt and to the point re: Cat's initial concerns. If you have ever read any of my posts they are the same, blunt, to the point and sometimes I try to insert my humor.

I've never emailed anyone on this board, I've never pm'd, I've never recd. a pm. What I post is pretty much how I feel. So whatever behind the scenes takes place I can't comment on because I don't know.

Cat, based on your reply you make yourself look like a victim of my post, yes, I said "While I know you consider yourself a triplet mom"...your response..."wow"...
I don't get it...because of your situation if someone states that because you have two children rather than 3 you find that insulting? I simply stated what I saw as fact and how taking advice from someone with 2 children is different when you are seeking advice to help you with 3 children.
Did not mean to cause a flame war or anything of the sort...and Ma K, I was not being rude, simply stating my opinion.


Jonib
16 month old cuties, Abby, Andy and Caroline
Rhett 9

no, I can't get the lily pie to work

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Ma Kettle
Tue May-08-07 05:12 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
498 posts


#276770, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

I don't think it's the bragging that has some up in arms on it's own. Just the placement sometimes.... for example in a thread where someone says their children are having a hard time with something and looking for suggestions. It's not the place to brag about how early someone else's child learned and how quickly they pick things up. Or someone who posts about how difficult it was taking their trio to the park and having someone else post that their kids are always behaved and a dream to take to the park. It can be taken as rubbing it in or accentuating an already stressful situation rather than helping.

I find myself doing the same thing at times with the intentions of being helpful... but finding later that it was taken differently and thought of as 'one-upping' rather than encouraging.

and that was rude JoniB - if you don't feel someone fits your ideal qualifications to give advice skip the post. Others may find it helpful even if you don't.
http://lilypie.com>

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tripletots98
Tue May-08-07 05:17 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1260 posts


#276772, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 15


>and that was rude JoniB - if you don't feel someone fits your
>ideal qualifications to give advice skip the post. Others may
>find it helpful even if you don't.

You were doing just fine up until the last paragraph Ma! What was the point in saying that about JoniB? Take you own advice & SKIP IT!

Amy~
Paige, Austin & Hailee - 8yrs
10/29/98 34w1d

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6BlueEyes
Tue May-08-07 05:12 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
198 posts


#276771, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

I guess that I don't understand what the big deal is. When you post often on a board that gets as much traffic as this one does, some people are going to like what you say and some are not. You must know that. Unless I am not understanding this correctly, it sounds like someone was nice enough to privately email you to let you know that people are taking some of your posts in a way that you probably did not intend. If you don't agree with her, just keep posting the way you have been. If you do agree with her, you can just change the way you say things. Either way, this "apology" probably did not help anything at all.

Kelly
Ben, Jack & Drew 05/28/02
Charlie 07/06/06

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fivenelli
Tue May-08-07 05:37 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
205 posts


#276780, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 16

Kelly,

You said precisely what I wanted to say and saved me the keystrokes. Kudos!
Jeanne
Mommy to Frank, Grace & Sarah 1/18/02

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naynay
Tue May-08-07 05:38 PM
Member since Feb 28th 2007
168 posts


#276781, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 16

Hi Ladies,
I think that we are all very sensitive, including me! I attacked a poster the other day because I did not want to be lectured about germs! (to that poster - I am sorry for jumping down your throat) I think that we are all passionate about what we believe in and it rubs off as being overly sensitive. I can't comment about the situation that is going on because I know nothing about it and quite frankly, I think that I am better off. I usually do not comment on things that is none of my business but I do not think that once the nice weather is here to stay we will all hopefully be rid of our cabin fever and see the brighter side of things. (Sorry if I sound like a Brady Bunch episode)

Renee
MOM to GBG born @ 29 weeks

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Rosemarie3
Tue May-08-07 05:32 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1198 posts


#276779, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0



Cat I really do not get your need to address this here. If someone sent you a private message you should have sent it back to them there and handeled this off the board. Yet again you have found a way to draw attention to yourself and in the process point out how wonderful and great your children are.

You are not the only mom on here that has 31 weekers, and some of us have 31 weekers that did not have to take fish oil not to have speech problems. However some of us have been giving our kids the damn #### from day one and yet we are still doing speech therapy, dealing with sensory issues and many other things. We do not know if it is because they were premature or because they inherated from someone in the family. However we do not feel the need to come on here and post everyday about the fact that they are counting to 10 and can say their abc's yes I am proud of my children but I understand the dynamics of having premature children, like many others and do not feel the need to let everyone know everytime my children go to the bathroom.
BBG Triplets Born March 31, 2004
31 weeks three days
Douglas
Kalie and
John Michael

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tripplefun
Tue May-08-07 07:42 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
876 posts


#276796, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

I have to agree with a few others. Its not that most mind that you brag about your kids, its the words you use, the posts you respond to, and where you post them.
Sorry but... 3 year olds are not VET children. I remember a year or so ago if a mom with 3 year olds posted on the vets board they were more than likely chased away. This is just my opinion, after all is a public forum. Anyone can post on ANY forum here. Nothing against you personally but I for one do not want to go to the vets board and see alot of posts about 3 year olds, so I no longer go there. However in your defense I have suggested that there be a forum for the in between kiddos, say 3 to 5. Of course my opinion means squat around here and it never happened but I thought it was a good idea.

Jonib, I think your post was to the point, nothing wrong with it. Everyone has there own opinions.
Sandy, mom to

Matt just turned 18, It cant be, my baby cannot be 18 already!

We just had a birthday
Sydney 7
Morgan 7
Cade 7

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DebM
Tue May-08-07 08:17 PM
Member since Mar 31st 2006
621 posts


#276807, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Question for you ladies

Why can't you all just accept her apology without analyzing and picking every thing apart?

"well you said this"...or "it's where you post your answers"...or blah blah blah. It's ridiculous

Leave her alone, please!

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Tasha
Tue May-08-07 09:29 PM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
1287 posts


#276815, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 0

Cat,

As I said I wasn’t trying to upset or cause dramas or I would have posted publicly. I choose to be respectful and PM you, and to keep all this off the board.

I do believe your heart was in the right place with your apology.
But the point of my pm was not that you shouldn’t talk about your kids. It was where and the frequency you choose to brag. What your children can do is a big part of who your children are. You can’t separate that out from them. Nobody is asking you to. But how you word thing and where you post them can drastically change how it is perceived by others.

I know many of you will think that I was out of line sending anything to Cat or that I am just jealous. That is fine, think what you will. After reading basically the same comment in email I could have said nothing and let it all continue to go on. I thought a private PM to her letting her know how others perceived her posts was better. That was my intention. Solely to let you know how some others perceived the posts, not how she was intending them.

I’m sorry my message made you feel you needed to post this apology. I obviously didn’t express myself properly and for that I apologize. As I said I was not trying in anyway to upset you.
Tasha
Julia, Megan & Alex 7/00 at 30 weeks
Abby 12/02
http://www.walkamerica.org/tashajma

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fivenelli
Wed May-09-07 08:33 AM
Member since Jul 18th 2005
205 posts


#276843, "RE: Apology"
In response to Reply # 32

Wow! Now that's an actual apology. Allowing for the possibility that something you did or said caused pain or suffering for someone else and then offering your sincere regret.
Jeanne
Mommy to Frank, Grace & Sarah 1/18/02

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